Wednesday, January 11, 2017

The 2 types of Mommy friends we all need to survive


In my opinion, there are 2 types of Mommy friends we all need in order to navigate these extremely long, exhausting, lonely, repetitive, chaotic days of raising small humans who will hopefully not grow up to be complete and total assholes. Never, ever underestimate the power of a text from one of these women at 2pm on a Thursday when your trying not to lose your shit after spending 45 minutes searching your entire house for a pair of scissors your 6yr old swears she put back in its place and can absolutely not complete her homework packet without.

Mommy Friend #1- This is your person. She gets you. She's known you since you were in 6th grade stuffing your bra with Kleenex while wearing glasses that were too big for your face and trying to figure out how to straighten your hair on an ironing board {I'm speaking hypothetically; I skipped that awkward stage completely.} She's been there through boyfriends, and marriages, and babies. She will most likely {hopefully} outlive your husband and the two of you will spend your final days together guzzling wine, bitching about the weather, and terrorizing the stock boys at Kroger on your motorized carts {not that you've discussed it because thats just morbid and weird}. When you approach her with another one of your crazy ideas, she responds like this:

Mommy Friend #2: This is the friend you made sometime after high school when you were in that stage where you thought you had your shit together but really your shit was all over the place. She's that girl you never thought would hang out in your life as long as she did but now you cant imagine your life without her. She knew you when you were just getting to know yourself and she accepted the screwed up version you were wholeheartedly. She keeps you in check with that girl you used to be who had no boundaries, no obligations, no restrictions, no husband, no kids. She's sarcastic and hilarious and gives zero shits....and when you tell her your going to start a blog, she responds exactly the way you want her too because if it was anything less, it wouldnt be her:

Find your version of these women. Hang on to them. Bribe them with free wine when you're so far deep in the shithole that is Motherhood you cant see straight, let alone carry on meaningful conversation with anyone over the age of 5. Let them remind you of who you used to be and who you will be again someday. Celebrate with them when their kid potty trains {is there really any greater cause to celebrate?} and cry with them when life gets hard. Snapchat them pictures of your wine for now and hold on to the hope that someday soon you'll be bailing on a homework packets to sip wine with them in person. 

1 comment:

  1. This is your Anonymous female parent wanting to know what brand of $8 wine at Rite Aid is actually palatable, if not pleasurable!!

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